| The Master Of The Ceremony |
- The festivities have begun
The Master of The Ceremony arrives
Surrounded by his pupils in eyelash blue
Scouring the crowd for adult content beliefs
They briefly rearrange the slot on their BVD's
To avoid the Cyclops gaze scaring the children
Who still believe in the white owl mystery
Of nocturnal emissions announcing manhood
When they are carried off to war camp
On the backs of armored Galapagos Turtles
To study Custer war plans and strategy
For heathen rodent extermination
The Master of The Ceremony cracks his whip
Announcing only those who are deemed worthy
Of the blessing performed in Lakota disguise
Will have their phlegm boyancy challenged
He then levitates his angst to Defcon 3
Tossing caution into the Teflon wind
Screaming a e eye oh you bugga bugga
His produces the magic eagle carcass
With coyote trap cyanide burns and Easter Egg color
Shaking it at the captive ate it crowd
Demands gold for his service and guarantee
Of a chrome bumper crop of magic Bombora Beanies
The Ceremony finished in stain and linseed
The Master packs up his gold and gathers his pupils
Who have been busy winking at strangers
And arranging private ceremonial lap dances
At the Side Tracked and Fielded Club
And loads them into the Holy Dodge Caravan
He races off to his next performance
Where he will convince spinsters of his undying love
Guaranteed by their signature on the dotted eyes
Of short term 10 to life assurance avoidable they're told
By small daily payment without interest till next beer
For well qualified finishers and others
